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Basic Toilet Humor

Toilet humor has long been the reliable retreat of your Daily, and writers stay alert of notable bog-related stories and key events, particularly within football. What a delight it was to find out that a prominent writer a well-known presenter has a West Brom-themed urinal within his residence. Consider the situation regarding the Barnsley supporter who interpreted the restroom a little too literally, and needed rescuing from a deserted Oakwell after falling asleep on the loo during halftime of a 2015 loss against Fleetwood Town. “He had no shoes on and couldn't find his phone and his cap,” stated an official from the local fire department. And nobody can overlook during his peak popularity playing for City, the controversial forward entered a community college for toilet purposes back in 2012. “His luxury car was stationed outside, before entering and requesting directions to the restrooms, subsequently he entered the faculty room,” a student told a Manchester newspaper. “After that he was just walking around the college grounds like he owned the place.”

The Toilet Resignation

Tuesday marks 25 years from when Kevin Keegan quit as England manager after a brief chat inside a lavatory booth together with Football Association official David Davies in the underground areas of Wembley, after the notorious 1-0 loss versus Germany during 2000 – England’s final match at the historic stadium. As Davies recalls in his journal, his private Football Association notes, he stepped into the wet struggling national team changing area immediately after the match, only to find David Beckham in tears and Tony Adams motivated, both players begging for the official to reason with Keegan. Subsequent to Hamann's direct free-kick, Keegan had trudged down the tunnel with a thousand-yard stare, and Davies found him slumped – reminiscent of his 1996 Liverpool behavior – within the changing area's edge, muttering: “I’m off. I’m not for this.” Grabbing Keegan, Davies tried desperately to salvage the situation.

“Where could we possibly locate [for a chat] that was private?” remembered Davies. “The passageway? Swarming with media. The changing area? Crowded with emotional footballers. The shower area? I was unable to have a crucial talk with the national coach while athletes jumped in the pool. Only one option presented itself. The toilet cubicles. A crucial incident in the Three Lions' storied past happened in the old toilets of a stadium facing demolition. The approaching dismantling was nearly palpable. Leading Kevin into a compartment, I closed the door after us. We stayed there, eye to eye. ‘You can’t change my mind,’ Kevin said. ‘I'm leaving. I'm not capable. I’m going out to the press to tell them I’m not up to it. I can’t motivate the players. I can't extract the additional effort from these athletes that's required.’”

The Aftermath

Consequently, Keegan quit, later admitting that he had found his period as Three Lions boss “soulless”. The two-time European Footballer of the Year stated: “I struggled to occupy my time. I began working with the visually impaired team, the deaf squad, assisting the women's team. It's an extremely challenging position.” English football has come a long way over the past twenty-five years. Regardless of improvement or decline, those Wembley restrooms and those twin towers are no longer present, while a German now sits in the technical area Keegan previously used. Tuchel's team is considered among the frontrunners for the upcoming Geopolitics World Cup: National team followers, value this time. This specific commemoration from one of England's worst moments acts as a memory that circumstances weren't consistently this positive.

Current Reports

Follow Luke McLaughlin at 8pm UK time for women's football cup news regarding Arsenal versus Lyon.

Today's Statement

“There we stood in a long row, clad merely in our briefs. We were Europe’s best referees, premier athletes, inspirations, mature people, mothers and fathers, resilient characters with high morals … yet nobody spoke. We barely looked at each other, our eyes shifted somewhat anxiously when we were requested to advance in couples. There Collina observed us from top to bottom with a freezing stare. Silent and observant” – former international referee Jonas Eriksson reveals the humiliating procedures referees were previously subjected to by former Uefa head of referees Pierluigi Collina.

Football Daily Letters

“How important is a name? There’s a poem by Dr Seuss titled ‘Too Many Daves’. Did Blackpool encounter Steve Overload? Steve Bruce, along with aides Steve Agnew and Steve Clemence have been dismissed through the exit. Is this the termination of the Steve fascination? Not quite! Steve Banks and Steve Dobbie remain to manage the main squad. Full Steve ahead!” – John Myles.

“Since you've opened the budget and distributed some merchandise, I have decided to put finger to keypad and offer a concise remark. Ange Postecoglou states that he picked fights in the schoolyard with youngsters he anticipated would defeat him. This masochistic tendency must account for his decision to join Nottingham Forest. As a lifelong Spurs supporter I'll continue appreciating the subsequent season award but the only second-season trophy I can see him winning near the Trent River, if he remains that duration, is the second division and that would be quite a challenge {under the present owner” – Stewart McGuinness.|